Saturday 13 July 2013

OF DREAMS, FANTASIES AND MELANCHOLY...

OF DREAMS, FANTASIES AND MELANCHOLY... 

I am in a fix ! It's about which one shall I choose from the two associates of sleep : dream or nightmare? I would prefer to go for the 1st one, because dreams are normally happy & pleasant, while nightmares are not. But, I couldn't help - because, both are beyond my control. In a number of occasions in the past, while going to bed, I did rewind my pleasant memories to the maximum extent possible in order to have nice dreams in my sleep, but almost every time my desire was not fulfilled. I  could dream nothing, which could be called pleasant ! To the contrary, nightmares haunted me for a long time after I got up from bed !

Like many others, I too had day dreams and I wished these dreams come true. But, that was not to be ! I fancied many a good things in life, most of them consumables, which I desired to possess. But, while asleep, these things went on eluding and eluding me and thus I never got the 'taste' of the desired fantasy-land, which would make me happy ! I can not blame anyone but me for having these kind of wild desires and getting cheated eventually !

I didn't have any idea about what melancholy is till the end of my college days. Everything went nicely, I was pampered quite well at home by my parents, grandparents and elders in the family and all my friends and relatives were very kind towards me. There was no death in the family for a long time, no economic or social problems or even none of my books or articles were lost.

Then one night I had a dream (or nightmare?) that kept me weeping and sweating throughout the night until my mom reached my room at dawn, saw me weeping profusely and woke me up. When asked about the reason of my crying, I couldn't tell her anything about the details of the nightmare (or dream?). I was numb - totally numb for about half an hour and I became sort of blunt. I was extremely sad and melancholia gripped my senses throughout the day. Believe me, the nightmare was about the death of my dearest college friend in a road accident, the name of whom I better refrain from divulging. Fortunately, he is very much alive even today !

This "50th post" today carries some pictures taken by me in the past. Mostly color slides/transparencies, these pictures were damaged beyond repair. I took a chance and sandwiched two or three of them together in order to see what a dream looks like! What you see below is the result of my experimentation. Happy viewing...

















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